


Shades Of Gray

by Thefanfictor



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Aromantic Character, Balcony Scene, Characters Watching Disney Movies, Dating, F/F, F/M, First Meetings, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Kisses, LGBTQ Character of Color, LGBTQ Female Character of Color, M/M, Martial Arts, Meeting the Parents, Picnics, Romantic Soulmates, Sarcasm, Trans Character, i mean it's maiko fic so that's kinda inevitable, s
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-14
Updated: 2017-11-28
Packaged: 2018-11-14 07:30:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11203284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thefanfictor/pseuds/Thefanfictor
Summary: This is a soulmate AU that I've never really seen a lot of portrayals of.  I've been wanting to explore what happens when people don't actually fall in love with, or even like, their soulmates and what the societal repercussions of being in a relationship with someone who isn't your soulmate would be.  I hope I do it justice.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> AU where you're born with one letter of your soulmate's name on the back of your neck in black, and it fills out with the rest of their name when you meet them for the first time. When they die, the soulmark turns red.

~~~~~~~~Zuko had been born with a thick, inky **K** on the back of his neck.  His mother smiled, saying it was a sign of a strong connection between him and his soulmate.  She rubbed her own soulmark ruefully.  She had kept it hidden ever since her marriage.

His father scoffed, saying it was sentimental nonsense.  "Old-fashioned and ridiculous," he said, voice a threatening rumble that made Ursa flinch with every word from his lips, the back of his neck unmarked.  "Zuko will marry his soulmate, yes, but this connection business is completely idiotic."

His uncle smiled at the mark, always a romantic.  "A strong connection is an excellent sign." But a realist as well.  "Although you never know what kind of connection it will be." The red soulmark on his neck seemed to glow in agreement with his words.

Azula teased him for the mark endlessly as they grew up, and Zuko tried to retaliate, although he was rarely successful.  She was always the golden child.  The one who always lied and never got caught.  Once, he thought he'd met his soulmate, but their romance ended nearly as suddenly as it began, the name filling out in the presence of their younger sister instead.

Generally, Zuko avoided his soulmate.  It was easier for everyone, and he was starting to think that the concept of love was an elaborate hoax.  But then everything changed, starting with a girl named Mai.

 ~~~~Spilling a cup of ice cream on one of his sister's best (and only) friends was not the greatest introduction Zuko had ever had to endure.  Especially given the fact that the girl in question was really, really hot.

"So sorry about that," Zuko stammered, fumbling for the napkin dispenser.

To her credit, the girl didn't seem rattled.  She glanced at the ice cream on her dark red shirt with a bored, albeit slightly exasperated, expression.  "Gee.  How refreshing."

Zuko blushed.  "I said sorry," he mumbled.  He rubbed the soulmark on the back of his neck, the way he always did when nervous.

The girl rolled her eyes.  "Whatever.  You're Zuko, right? Azula told me to expect you. Although she didn't tell me to expect you to be like this." The girl wrinkled her nose as she looked him up and down.

Zuko was getting more and more flustered as he tried to keep his train of thought coherent.  "Yeah, I'm Zuko," he said, a little forcefully.  "Why? Who are you?"

"Mai," said the girl, who now had a name, in a voice that was almost a sigh.  "I'll see you around.  Going to find your sister now.  You keep doing . . . whatever it is you were doing." She waved one pale hand languidly in his direction, the lights catching her black nail polish and making it gleam.  

As she walked away, Zuko tried to catch a glimpse of the back of her neck, but her hair, which was just as dark and reflective as her nails, obscured it.

"You like her," observed Azula, who was standing right behind him.  Her creepy ability to sneak up on people no matter where they were had never failed to make him jump.

"I do not!" Zuko said.  He'd never been a good liar.  Unlike Azula.

"Whatever you say," the fourteen-year-old replied, clearly not convinced.  "I don't think your soulmate would like that, Zuzu."

"Shut up," Zuko muttered.

"What a snappy retort," Azula muttered, examining her nails.  "I really don't know how you think of them."

"Whatever," Zuko said, trying and failing to control his blushing.  "Have fun."

 "We will!" Azula called after him as he stormed off.  He sat in his room for a while, trying to do homework, until he got bored and, hearing noises from downstairs, decided to investigate.

"You're watching a Disney movie?" Zuko said, looking on in disbelief.

"We're making fun of The Little Mermaid," Mai corrected, grabbing the remote and pausing it.  She raised an eyebrow in an almost artful manner.  "Care to join us?"

Zuko deliberated for a moment.  He hated his sister, and spending extended amounts of time with her wasn't really his idea of fun.  But on the other hand, this could be a chance to smooth things over with Mai after the earlier awkwardness.  No way could he pass that up.  "Sure, why not?" He seated himself on the couch next to Mai.  "I hate that movie."

She almost smiled.  Azula snatched the remote control and pressed play.

The next hour consisted of snarky comments about the plot, romance, design, soundtrack, and scientific implausibility of The Little Mermaid, mostly supplied by Mai and Azula, although Zuko chimed in whenever he thought of something that didn't sound completely idiotic.

Finally, it was over.  The three sat there for a second before Mai broke the silence.  "That was so happy I think I'm going to puke."

Zuko laughed.  He was liking this girl more and more.  "Every time," he agreed.

Mai turned towards him.  "Your family doesn't strike me as one for Disney."

"We're not," Zuko said.  "Dad says it's a waste of time.  Mom was the Disney fan in our family." He didn't add the "until she left".  He didn't need to.

"And you've always agreed with Mom, haven't you, Zuzu?" Azula said, smirking.

In that moment, there was nothing Zuko wanted more than to murder his sister.  He went with a classic "Shut up" instead, which earned him an annoyingly unbothered laugh from Azula and a quizzical look from Mai.

"Alright, well, you two have fun being depressing together," Azula said, pursing red lips.  "I'm going to get something productive accomplished this weekend, and I can't do it if I keep hanging around.  Zuko, for once in your miserable life, do try not to make a fool of yourself in front of a girl who isn't family." With that, she swept out of the living room.

"You're just going to leave your guest here to do homework?" Zuko yelled after her, annoyed at her ability to get the last word.  He turned to Mai and flinched at the sharp look she was giving him.

"I can function in someone else's home, Zuko," she said, rolling her eyes.

"Right," he stammered.  "I didn't mean to offend-I mean, it's just-"

Mai looked slightly amused now.  Was she capable of having strong emotions? "Are you done?"

Zuko could feel himself heating up again and chose not to answer that question.  He'd already embarrassed himself enough for one lifetime.  "Do you need anything?" He asked instead.

Mai stretched, then relaxed, leaning over the side of the couch lazily like a long, lanky cat.  "I'm fine."

A strange silence fell over them.  Zuko felt the need to say something to ease the tension.  "Um, so I was wondering," he began, not sure exactly where he was going with this, "to, um, apologize for the stuff earlier-" he could have slapped himself.  Why did he have to bring that up? How stupid could he be?

At least he had her attention now.  "You were wondering?" She prompted.

"Yeah, so I was thinking that maybe to, you know, make up for that . . . maybe I could take you out for ice cream or something?" He looked up at her hopefully, hands fidgeting.

She turned her head to look at him, hair shifting to reveal the edge of an inky black mark.  "Ice cream?"

 _Shit._ He hadn't forgotten that aspect of their awkward introduction, but it had drifted to the back of his mind, and he only considered the implications of what he was saying after he'd said it.  "Oh god, sorry!" He blurted.  "It doesn't have to be ice cream, we could just go for-I don't know-coffee, or tea, or something?" His voice squeaked on the end of the sentence, making him cringe inwardly.

Another raise of a thin eyebrow.  "Tea?"

"I know it sounds a little stereotypical," Zuko said, wishing he could make himself stop talking, "but my uncle owns a great place.  It's quiet, out of the way-" Zuko was starting to get the distinct feeling that he was fucking things up more with every word that came out of his mouth.  He pressed on.  "-but the tea is great, and I'll try not to, um, spill anything."

She eyed him for a few seconds and he tried not to look at the back of her neck.  "Sure, why not," she said, shrugging passively.  "Are you free Saturday?"

"I've got Japanese stuff with Azula at three, but I'm fine until then," Zuko said, heart feeling like it would hammer out of his chest.

"Cool."

"Cool."

He grinned at her, and she gave him a sort-of smile back.

Just when they had settled into a comfortable sort of silence, it was shattered by the sound of loud rap music, as well as laughter, overly high volume conversation, and several honks of a car horn.

"That would be my ride," Mai said with a sigh.  Azula came down the stairs, a scowl on her face, but it smoothed itself into a smile when she saw Mai.  

"Sorry to see you go, Mai.  I had a great time." She leaned forward, embracing the other girl, and Mai reciprocated stiffly.

Pulling back from the hug, she turned to Zuko.  "See you on Saturday?"

"Yes! Definitely! Absolutely!" Zuko said, smiling a bit wider than necessary.

She waved slightly, then turned and disappeared out the door.

Zuko collapsed backward onto the couch.  Never before had the ceiling looked so beautiful.

Azula leaned over the back of the couch, smirking down at him.  "Don't say a word," he warned her, scowling.  Surprisingly, she obeyed, tossing up her hands and turning away.  His smile returned.  What soulmate?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that's a thing now. Drop me a comment and/or a kudos if you liked it, they mean a lot!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of the previous chapter, wherein the tea date happens and we receive backstory.

That Saturday, Zuko took the bus down to Uncle's tea shop.  He had gotten Mai's number from Azula after copious amounts of begging and a fair bit of bribery so he could let her know where to go.  Hopefully she wouldn't get lost.  The way there could be a little confusing.

As the bus approached his stop, Zuko ran his fingers through his hair one last time, thumb brushing over the faded burn mark on his eye.   _Don't think about that,_ he told himself.   _It'll be fine.  She didn't notice last time and she won't this time either._

He checked his phone for the time.  He was a couple minutes early, but that was fine.  The bus ground to a halt and he forced himself to take a deep breath.  Time to get this show on the road.

The Jasmine Dragon was only a block away from the bus stop, and he'd been there enough times to commit the way to memory.  Pushing open the door, the bell jingling behind him, Zuko greeted the proprietor with a grin.  "Uncle Iroh!"

"Well, if it isn't my favorite nephew!" Iroh said, giving him a hug.  "Nice to see you back here again.  Trouble at home?"

"No, everything's fine," Zuko said.  "I'm meeting a . . ." He paused, not sure what to call her.  "A friend."

"Well, why don't you take the corner table and wait.  I'll make you your favorite!" Iroh gestured with his teapot.  "It's been a slow day, I'm glad to have company."

"Glad to see you too, Uncle." Zuko did as told and sat at the corner table, watching the street for any sign of Mai.  The tea shop was small and usually quiet, but wasn't easily missed, with the bright, inviting storefront and the shop name in bold letters over the door.  It was a calm, peaceful atmosphere, the flower bushes out front adding to the relaxing feel.

A few people came through the door, occupying other tables, but still no sightings of Mai.  She wouldn't bail on him, would she?  _You're just being paranoid,_ he thought, drumming his fingers on the tabletop.   _As always._

The bell jingled from the door.  There she was, wearing a black leather jacket over a short red dress, heeled black boots, and matching red fingerless gloves, looking around uncertainly.

"Mai! Over here!" Zuko said, standing and waving her over.  Heads turned, but fortunately one of them was hers.

"Thank goodness," Mai said, taking a seat across from him.  "I had to walk the whole way.  I was going to take the bus, but I missed it because some guy was trying to talk to me.  Ugh.  If you weren't here, I'd have to contemplate throwing myself off a bridge or going home to watch Netflix."

Zuko smiled, remembering (as if he'd ever forgotten) just why he liked hanging out with this girl.  "Well then, I guess I saved you from excruciating boredom this afternoon."

Mai waved a dismissive hand, nails still jet black.  "Please.  I'm in a constant state of excruciating boredom, I don't think anyone could save me from that."

"Challenge accepted."

She smirked at him, a gleam in her eyes.  "So, when do we order?"

"W-what?" Zuko stuttered, caught off guard.  "Oh, you mean the tea! My uncle will be here soon."

He was.  "Sorry for the wait, we're short staffed today." Iroh scrutinized Mai for a careful moment, then gave her a warm smile.  "It's nice to meet one of my nephew's friends.  He doesn't bring people here often."

"I'm sure it's a great honor," Mai said, offering him a small smile in return.  Iroh had that effect on people.

The two placed their (surprisingly similar) orders and settled in to wait.  "So," Zuko said, wishing he could think of a better conversation starter, "how're classes?"

This question seemed to be a catalyst for a lot of pent-up frustration for the both of them, and they vented to each other about teachers and classmates and assignments.  Zuko tried to get Mai to laugh or even smile, which she did once after an anecdote about the time he and his former friends (he used the term "friends" loosely) had snuck into the teachers' lounge and tried to steal some food on a dare.  They had ended up with a sushi container, a bag of chips, and a can of soda.  Mai's laugh was a quiet, low chuckle that sounded a little like the purr of a cat.  It made Zuko laugh a little as well.

Their tea came, barely interrupting their banter.  Mai was funny in a dark way.  Her jokes would probably be considered morbid in different company, but they were right up Zuko's alley.  He didn't notice the bell chime from the front until a problem was staring him in the face.

"Zuko! My main man!" Said the cocky, wisecracking, Inuit 15-year-old by the name of Sokka.  "Didn't know you were here, I thought you had that class with your crazy sister."

Zuko really didn't want to talk about Azula.  Or Japanese.  "That's later," he muttered.

"Alright, alright," Sokka said, filing that away for further use.  Then he saw Mai.  "Who's this, your new girlfriend?"

Zuko went red.  "She's not my girlfriend!" He said, louder than necessary.  Across the table, Mai looked faintly annoyed.

Sokka put up his hands.  "Sheesh.  Touchy subject."

"Piss off."

"Aw, that's no way to talk to your best friend!" He stuck out his hand over the table.  "I'm Sokka, pronounced with an 'okka'."

"Charmed."

Zuko managed not to look too murderous as he made small talk until Sokka finally decided they were boring and left.  "What's with him?" Mai asked.

Slumping, Zuko tried to figure out how to answer that.  "Sokka? It's complicated.  He's my . . ."  _Just say he's your annoying friend,_ Zuko thought.   _It's not that hard._ "He's my ex-boyfriend."  _Goddamnit Zuko._

Mai continued to look bored.

"I'm bi," Zuko added.  "We're still friends, he just likes to give me a hard time about . . ." he trailed off, waving his hand vaguely.  His heart pounded.

 Mai snorted.  "No wonder he was being like that.  I can't relate."

"What, no obnoxious exes come to interrupt your dates?" Zuko teased, overwhelmingly relieved.

"Nah, Ty Lee's chill.  You know her, right?"

It took Zuko a second to process what she'd said.  "Hard not to." As head of the cheerleaders and resident flirt, she was one of the school's most recognized figures.

"We dated for a bit.  We were soulmates, but it didn't end up working out.  She's . . . not one for dating."

"I thought Sokka was my soulmate.  It turned out to be his younger sister."

Mai laughed at that.  "Tea's finished.  Wanna jet?"

 Zuko got up.  "Can I walk you?" In theory, he knew it was getting close to 3, but he didn't really care.

"I don't see why not."

They took the shortest route possible to Mai's house, walking quickly, as she said her parents didn't like her being out for too long.  "My dad has a government job, so anything I do reflects on them," she explained, though Zuko hadn't asked.

He took her to the door, suddenly very aware of how close they were.  "Thanks for walking me," Mai said.  "I actually had an okay time." Her lips brushed against his cheek and she vanished inside.

Zuko stood outside the house for a few seconds, then turned and started away at a fast clip.  "Well," he said to no one in particular.  "I'd call that a success."


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which time passes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am mortified at how long this has taken me, my sincerest apologies.

After a month, hanging out with Mai made it onto the list of Things Zuko Enjoyed Doing, which was never all that long to begin with, so anything new was newsworthy.  Being Azula's friend, Mai came over once in a while and soon she and Zuko started doing more things on their own.

They mostly spent time together in public places, as neither of them liked being home too much, although neither wanted to talk about it.  They hung out in parks, mocking the happy, normal people and watching movies on Zuko's shitty laptop.  Romance was continually revisited so they could make fun of the pairing involved.  They broke out The Little Mermaid once in a while, though, just for kicks.

Sometimes they'd hang around downtown, but Mai insisted they keep to the backstreets.  "My parents don't want their daughter seen in public with some guy who's not her soulmate, even his he is Japanese with a super rich, super important family," she explained with a sigh.

"I'll be a gentleman," Zuko promised.  "Maybe wear a suit.  Or I could buy you something horribly sentimental."

"You wouldn't dare."

Another thing Zuko and Mai had in common was that both hated parties, the high school variety and the horrible politician-filled ones their respective parents made them attend.  Nevertheless, they did go to a beach party together on one occasion at Azula's request (it was phrased as a request, but like most of the things Azula said, it sounded like an order).  And when Azula made requests, it was always best to honor them.

When they arrived to the party, the host (a kid named Chan who Zuko hated immediately) showed them inside, whereupon Mai was accosted by Ty Lee, wearing a breezy white dress and a worried expression.  There was a large crowd of admirers waiting for her.  This seemed to be the problem.

"Mai, I need your help," she said in a stage whisper.  "I've tried to explain to these boys that I don't want to date them, but they're not listening!"

"Just tell them you don't like any of them," Mai said, rolling her eyes.  "Or beat them up if you want.  Either is acceptable."

"I can't be mean to them! They like me, and they've all been so nice!"

"Fine, I'll tell them I'm your soulmate and they'll back off."

"Thank you so much! You're amazing, Mai," Ty Lee said, throwing her arms around the other girl.  Mai patted her on the back a bit and the two of them went off together.

Zuko hung out not interacting with anyone until Mai got back.  He got them both drinks and some food and they spent the rest of the night sitting on a couch in the corner and talking about how universally awful parties were.

The place they spent the most time at was the Jasmine Dragon.  Iroh was always happy to see them and gave them free tea, asking about things at school but never feeling invasive.  The result was that they were always happy to see him as well.  During one of their visits, the topic came up somehow, and Zuko liked hearing what Mai had to say on the matter.

"You see, knowing you is a blessing and a curse," Mai said, sipping her tea with a gleam in her eyes.

"How so?" Zuko said, raising his eyebrows.  Playing this game was always entertaining.

"Well, the blessing is that I finally have someone to talk to that isn't hopelessly boring," Mai explained.  "You have no idea how rare that is."

"That's nice to hear."

"The curse is that I've had to expand my list of People That Make Me Feel Something Other Than Abject Misery by two," she continued, "And I haven't had any new additions since I met Ty Lee.  It's horribly inconvenient, and also interrupts my whole emotionless vibe."

"I'm glad we mean that much to you," Zuko said.  "What, exactly, do I make you feel?" He did his best to look curious.  He didn't do it often.

"Slight annoyance and an occasional hint of amusement," she said, eyes downright sparkling now.

He smiled.  "I'll take what I can get."

"You do that."

One night, on one of those rare occasions when they did hang out at Zuko's house, they were sitting on the balcony watching the sunset.  Zuko's father was away on a business trip and Mai had managed to get away from her parents by saying she'd be with Azula.  She looked beautiful as always in a dark red tank top, and she'd drawn flowers all up and down her pale arms with black marker.

"What's with the flowers?" Zuko said, tapping her shoulder to get her attention.

"Hm?" She turned away so he couldn't see her face.  "It's a fashion statement for the tragically goth.  Or the gothically tragic, I haven't decided yet."

He wasn't sure if he believed her, but decided to let the subject drop.  "It's nice out," he offered.

"Sure, if you like sunsets."

"Do you?"

"No," she replied.  "Orange.  Not my color."

He laughed, putting an arm around her shoulder.  She leaned against him, then withdrew, startled.  "What's that?"

"What's what?"

"That." Her fingertips traced the burned skin over his eye.

"It's a scar." He felt strange, letting her do this.  Vulnerable.  Zuko usually didn't let people touch his scar.  But, he supposed, Mai was an exception.

"I know that," she said, rolling her eyes.  "But when did this happen? How?"

"It was a while ago," he said stiffly.  "Around the time I broke up with Sokka, actually." There.  A diversion.

She frowned.  It was clear she wasn't going to let this go, but for now . . ."Do you miss him?"

The question was so unexpected, Zuko almost laughed.  "No, like I said, we're still friends." He felt her relax.  "And, you know, I think he's with some girl now."

She smiled a little.  "What?" Zuko asked.

"It's just that he might say something similar about you."

"Huh? I mean, do you . . . Am I . . .?" Zuko stammered, not sure what to say without getting tongue-tied.

She sighed impatiently, then leaned over and kissed him.  Zuko's insides heated up like toaster coils, so warm he felt as though if he exhaled hard enough, he'd set the roof on fire.

They broke apart, smiling at each other.  "So, did you mean . . .?" Zuko hesitated.  "Do you like me?"

"I guess I might," Mai said.  "You're not horrible."

"Like, in a dating way?" Zuko had to ask.

"Yes, like in a dating way." She was blushing a little, and so was he.

"I guess I might like you too."

"Good."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Those who leave comments and kudos shall receive a lifetime supply of Author Gratitude.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which they must navigate the inevitable problems that come with relationships like theirs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Neither Mai's nor Zuko's relationship with their parents is an example of a healthy parent-child dynamic. They have both normalized this treatment, but that doesn't make it good.

Zuko had to get used to calling Mai his girlfriend.  More often then not, he'd start with "friend", then catch and correct himself.  Which led to some weird looks.

That wasn't to say that the act of dating Mai in and of itself didn't attract weird looks and snide remarks.  People who saw them together always seemed to react the same way.

"You know you guys won't last, right?"

"Don't you have a soulmate? Why aren't you dating her?"

"You're not going to be happy together.  Just break up now and get it over with."

Mai never looked especially bothered by these comments, but for Zuko, they stung, though he tried to act otherwise.  He'd look at her and wonder how she could keep cool at times like these when all he could do was blow up.  "I've had a lot of practice" was all she said when he asked.  

For this reason, they usually didn't tell people about their relationship unless asked directly.  Which was why it was such a shock that over lunch one day, at some generic, unmemorable fast food place, Mai broached the topic of parents.

"What about them?" Zuko asked, trying not to look too nervous.

"Well, I told mine about you."

It took him a moment to fully process what she'd said.  "Why? I thought you said they wouldn't like it!"

"Well, they were going to find out sometime.  What would be the point of keeping it from them?"

"Whatever.  What did they say?"

"Not much." Mai poked at her food.  She somehow kept up her usual air of detachment.  "They want to meet you."

If he'd been drinking, Zuko would've choked.  "You mean they approve?"

"I never said that." She met his eyes.  "So if you want to come over sometime for dinner and listen to my parents insulting us both and making 'subtle' jabs about nonmate dating, you'd be perfectly free."

"Sounds great." 

The next weekend, Azula teased him as he got ready, watching with a skeptical eye as he tried to do his hair.  It seemed to be getting even messier the more he worked.

"Why are you so worried about this, Zuzu? It's just meeting your girlfriend's parents, who actively disapprove of your relationship and will be looking for any possible excuse to keep you apart." His sister rested her chin on a hand, managing to emulate an almost Mai-like bored exasperation.  "Honestly, you're getting all worked up over nothing," she sighed.  "Well, off you go, then."

Dinner went as predicted.  Mai's parents seemed friendly at first.  They mostly ignored Mai unless it was to scold her, or talked to Zuko about her as if she wasn't in the room, but that was nothing out of the ordinary.  Zuko's father did it to him all the time when he wasn't away (his mother had been different, but he assumed she was the exception to the rule).  Her brother seemed cute, and it was clear her parents doted on him.  Then they began the questioning.

"So, Zuko, how did you meet our daughter exactly?" Mai's mother inquired, refilling his teacup.  "She's not very social.  I've always said she needs to get out more."

Zuko shrugged.  He wasn't the best with words, and he had a feeling that whatever answer he gave wouldn't be good enough.  "She's friends with my sister.  We had her over and I took her out for tea."

"That's nice," the older woman replied.  "I've always said Mai never shows a true appreciation for her culture.  She's so moody.  I don't like that.  Girls need to be sweet, not brooding."

"I don't mind," Zuko said.

"Don't you? How . . . interesting.  How long have you two known each other?"

"About two months," Zuko said.  He resisted the urge to rub at his soulmark, which always seemed to calm him down.

"Have you seen anyone else recently? I like a nice traditional match, you know, but people these days do seem to have very peculiar ideas about these sorts of things.  I've always said no good can come of it."

Zuko looked to Mai for help, but she was staring intently at her napkin and wouldn't meet his eyes.

"Not recently," he said, hoping she'd give up on the interrogation.  No such luck.

"Well, are you not marked then? Or is it something else? Mai, that Ty Lee girl was so nice, but that didn't end up working out, now did it?"

The napkin seemed to be even more interesting all of a sudden.  "No, it didn't."

"Look me in the eye while I'm talking to you!" Her mother snapped, making Zuko nearly jump out of his chair.  "Don't make me say it again, young lady, improve your behavior when we have guests.". She switched focus back to Zuko.  "I'm sorry about her."

"It's fine," Zuko said, a little shaken.

Mai finally looked up.  "No, it didn't," she repeated.

"I've always said you were both being silly about the whole thing.  She used to come to your karate matches.  You two would have been so lovely.  But enough about that, Zuko, how're your parents?"

This continued until dessert, which Zuko finished as soon as he could.  Mai, in a surprise move, as she hadn't said more than three words together thus far, asked if she could show him the rest of the house.  Zuko was more than happy to go along.

"I'm sorry about them," she said as soon as they were out of earshot.

"I'm sorry about them, too," Zuko said.  "But back there, did your mom say something about karate?"

"Yeah.  I fight competitively.  Although I haven't really been challenged in a while.  After I started getting good, beating people just wasn't exciting."

"That's cool," Zuko said, and meant it.  "I do a little martial arts, but I don't compete.  I wish I could see that, I bet you're awesome."

Mai shrugged.  "You can come to my next match.  I'll text you the address."

"Sounds great." 

Zuko arrived a little early for the bout, but Mai seemed happy to see him.  She wore the traditional loose white clothing and colored belt, a far cry from her normal attire.  A black ink rose peeked out from her sleeve, petals stretching across her wrist.  She was almost smiling.

"Hey," Zuko said as he got closer to her.  "Nice to see you."

"Dork," she said, and kissed him.  "Glad you're here."

"Wouldn't miss it."

The dojo started filling up, the modest crowd talking and laughing and waiting for the match to begin.  People were still filing in when one couple in particular caught Zuko's eye.  It was Sokka, laughing and talking, with his arm around . . . a girl?

The girl in question was wearing the same karate outfit as Mai, but on her it hung looser, her body sharp angles whereas Mai was all soft lines.  She was muscular, broad-shouldered, and a couple inches taller than Sokka, her pale skin throwing her short, reddish hair into sharp relief.  She had a strong jaw and a straight nose, and Sokka looked at her like she was the moon.

Something about that look made Zuko feel like someone was repeatedly twisting his internal organs.  He realized it was the same feeling he got whenever Mai (or her parents) mentioned Ty Lee.  That was something he refused to dwell on.

Sokka and the mystery girl were facing away from Zuko now, Sokka clapping her on the shoulder.  There was spiky black writing across the back of his neck, but Zuko couldn't quite make it out.  

"Knock 'em dead out there, Suki," Sokka was saying.  "You'll do great! And I promise I won't cheer too much."

"Thanks, Sokka," Mystery Girl-Suki-said, kissing him on the cheek.  "I'm an elite warrior who's trained for years, I think I'll do okay."

"That's why I love you!" Sokka called as Suki walked away.  He climbed the stands, not really looking where he was going, and took a seat far too close for Zuko's liking.  Chuckling, Sokka tore his gaze away from Suki and Zuko tried not look like he'd been staring.  It didn't work.

"Ah! Zuko! You're here?!"

"Yeah," Zuko said, folding his arms and facing away.  

Sokka hesitated.  He seemed about to say something, then changed his mind.  "Cool."

They stayed that way until the match started.  Zuko saw Mai and her opponent facing off.  He noted that said opponent was also Sokka's . . . someone, Suki.  He wasn't sure how he felt about that.

Both girls were fast and light on their feet, which wasn't surprising.  The punches, jabs, and blocks were so swift it was hard to tell who had the upper hand.  Zuko was stunned.  He'd expected Mai to be good, but this was far beyond his expectations.

To her credit, Suki was definitely holding her own.  She took the hits well and had superb balance, managing to avoid some of Mai's worse attacks and recovering quickly from the blows that did land.  She even caught Mai with a chop to the ribs that made her stumble, just a little.

"Your girlfriend's great," Sokka said, breaking the silence between them as Zuko watched.

"She's not my-" Zuko caught himself.  "Yeah, she's amazing."

Sokka regarded him curiously and shrugged.  "So, I was thinking that maybe you, your girlfriend, Suki, and myself could hang out for a while afterwards? Double date?"

Zuko considered this.  Did he want to see Sokka and his girlfriend together? Did he want to bring Mai? She hadn't spoken to Sokka much before, and hadn't liked him a lot.  Thinking about it made that twisting in his gut intensify.  "Maybe.  I should ask Mai first.  Probably not."

"Oh, right.  Of course.  Sorry.  I forgot, she doesn't like people." Sokka turned away, the jagged soulmark even more visible.  Zuko now saw that part of it read  **Suki**.  He focused back on the match.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that Suki has only faced off against Ty Lee and Azula, not Mai, and that Mai fights primarily with knives, so there's really no way to tell how they would battle each other in a weapon-free environment, but it's fun to speculate. If you liked it, please drop me a symbol of your appreciation in the form of kudos/comments. I'm much obliged.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there is more relationship stuff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for my shit-tastic upload schedule, I swear I'm trying. It's getting hard with school and stuff but this fic is not abandoned.

Mai won the match.  All the light and energy that had radiated from her person vanished when the ref declared her the victor, replaced with her usual look.  Sokka gave Zuko a nervous glance, then hurried down to commiserate with his girlfriend.

"You were great," Zuko said when he'd scrambled off the bleachers.  "Seriously."

"Thanks," Mai said flatly.

"You're not happy about winning?"

She heaved another great sigh.  Really, sighing was almost an art form with this girl.  "No.  Well, kind of.  God, just when I thought I'd finally have a challenge for once.  Oh well.  Victory is boring."

By the looks of it, she'd been pretty challenged for most of the fight, but Zuko decided not to bring that up.  "I guess.  Want to . . . I don't know . . . watch a terrible movie at my house? My dad's not home."

"When is he ever?" Mai said.  "Sure, let's go."

Zuko picked The Karate Kid for the sake of irony.  Mai couldn't resist an eye roll at that, but they had what might be considered fun hating on it.  

"It's a proven fact that it's practically impossible to make a martial arts movie that doesn't suck," Mai said as the credits rolled.

"Not completely impossible?" Zuko had to ask.

"Kung Fu Panda," Mai deadpanned.

They shared a sigh (perhaps Mai's habits were rubbing off on him) and finished the movie in silence.

"You know, Ty Lee used to come to my events all the time," Mai said eventually.

Zuko felt himself tense.  "Yeah?"

"She'd yell 'encouraging' things at me from the sidelines.  I guess it was practice for her whole cheerleading thing.  I'd go to her gymnastics stuff too."

"That's cool, I guess." Why was she telling him this?

"She still comes, just not as often."

"Why are you telling me this?"

She shrugged.  "I don't know.  I just thought it was interesting and kind of related to what we were talking about.  Why does there have to be a reason?"

Zuko felt weirdly defensive.  Where did she get off acting like he was the one being irrational when it was her who'd started the whole thing in the first place? "I don't know! Why do you have to keep talking about her? Why do your parents have to keep talking about her?"

"Why do you care so much about my parents? Why does it bother you so much to talk about her?" Mai sounded almost angry, which was quite unlike her.  "She's my friend! I'm allowed to do that!"

"It just bothers me, okay?!" Zuko definitely sounded angry now.  He could never back down from something once he'd started it.  "And she's not just your  _friend_ , she's your ex-girlfriend and your fucking soulmate! Everyone expects you to be together.  You could do that, too, without all the shit that comes with me dating you." He was breathing hard now, face red.  "You'd be the perfect couple who your parents would approve of.  You could've been together without the baggage and no one would disapprove! You two could've had that!  She could've had you! And she threw it away, or you got bored of not being troubled, and now you're stuck with me.  You sound like you miss her, miss that, and I don't blame you.  I'm just not good enough, I guess.  For you or anyone else."

Mai was quiet for a few seconds.  Zuko could hear his own heart thumping in his chest.  He counted beats.  Finally, she spoke.

"Is that really what you think about yourself, Zuko? Is that really what you think about me? That you're some sort of consolation prize for me while I'm pining after my dream  girl? That I'm just dating you because I'm  _bored_?"

"Mai, I didn't mean that, I just-"

"Just  _what_? What do you want from me? Ty Lee's my soulmate, but I'm over that.  It just didn't work out.  She didn't throw anything away, she doesn't want that kind of relationship and I'm fine with that! I like you, and I don't care what anyone else thinks, or I try not to.  You're one of the only people I do care about, Zuko.  I get that you're jealous of the whole soulmate deal or whatever, but don't take it out on her.  Just talk to me."

Zuko stared.  It was possibly the longest he'd ever heard her speak.  When his voice came back, all he could think to say was: "I'm not jealous."

Mai looked at him.

"Okay, fine, maybe I am a little jealous.  But it's impossible not to be!" Zuko heard his voice rising again and fought to control it.

"Well, I'm glad you told me.  We can work on it.  I have to go now."

"Is this about me?"

"No, I just should probably be heading back.  My parents will yell at me if I'm not home soon."

Zuko nodded.  He grabbed her coat and handed it to her.  "Can I walk you home?"

"No, I'll be fine."

That stung, but Zuko tried not to show it.  "Fine."

"I'll see you later.  Don't do anything too dangerous."

He tried for a smile and walked her to the door.  An idea was forming in his brain, something he wanted to do and was afraid to do.  Something that would show Mai he wasn't ashamed of their relationship.  That he could handle everything that came with it.

When he called her the next night, he was absolutely sure.  "I want to tell my dad."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, please leave comments and kudos, they mean the world to this humble author.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Zuko's dad sucks and Mai is supportive. What else is new?

Silence.

Zuko waited a few seconds.  Then a few more.  He was starting to wonder if he'd accidentally disconnected the phone when she spoke up.

"What?"

"I want to tell my dad," Zuko repeated, already feeling defensive again.  "You know, about . . . us."

"Why do you want to do that? I thought you said he'd hate it.  Zuko, if this is about that argument we had, you don't have to do this just because--"

"I want to!" Zuko said.  Why didn't she get it? "You told your parents.  If you can do it, I can too.  Azula knows, and she might use it against me any second.  I'd rather do it myself."

"That's . . . sweet." He couldn't tell if she was being sarcastic or not.  "Thank you.  Are you sure?"

"Yeah, of course! Why wouldn't I be?" Annoyance pricked at the edges of his brain.

"No reason.  I just--I want you to be safe."

"My dad's not going to hurt me," Zuko said, forcing a laugh into his voice.   _Again_ , he thought.  "It'll be fine, Mai.  He's in a good mood, one of his business deals worked out or something, it'll be fine.  Maybe he'll take it well."

"Okay, if you're sure.  Let me know how it goes."

"I will." He ended the call.

A week later, Zuko showed up at Mai's place and rang the doorbell.  Mai's mother answered.  "Oh, hello, Zuko.  What a . . . pleasure to see you again! Are you here for Mai? I've always said she should spend more time out of her room with nice boys like you."

"Yeah, actually.  Can you get here down here?"

Mai came down the stairs a moment later.  She wore dark makeup with black fingerless gloves, and her dress looked like a cross between a red kimono and a pair of overalls.  She smiled at him, a question in her eyes.  "Hey.  Nice to see you.  Why didn't you call?"

Zuko jammed his hands in his pockets.  "Sorry.  I would've, but my dad took away my phone." He avoided her gaze.  "Um, balcony?"

"Mom?"

"Sure, honey, go right ahead.  I've always said lots of fresh air is good for you.  I'll watch Tom-Tom.  You kids have fun!" Michi gave a little wave and darted out of the room.

Mai pulled him up the stairs, her thin fingers cold on his wrist.  "Come on, let's get away from my family." She gave him another smile, and Zuko let himself smile back.  They sat on deck chairs overlooking the street.  Mai locked the fancy glass doors behind them and looked at him expectantly.  Waiting.

"What is it with us and balconies?" Zuko wondered aloud.

His girlfriend rolled her eyes.  "That's the first thing you say to me when we're finally alone?"

"I'm just saying.  We spend lots of time on them."

"They're private, I guess.  Now, tell me what happened with your dad.  Did he say anything?"

Something about her tone rubbed him the wrong way.  "Of course he said something.  Why wouldn't he say anything after I said something to him?"

"You know what I mean, Zuko.  Answer the question."

His hand went to the back of his neck again.  Rubbing against that stupid ever-present mark.  "He looked . . . really calm.  For most of it.  I probably shouldn't have told him the way I did, it was kind of a bombshell, I should've eased into it, I didn't do it right, I--"

"Zuko." Mai put her hand on his knee.  He hadn't realized he was shaking.  "Slow down." Her touch felt like an ice cube drawing all the heat out of a wound.

He took a deep, shuddering breath.  "Okay.  I'm okay."

"You don't have to talk about it if--"

"It's fine!" Zuko said, louder than he meant to.  "It's fine." He dug his nails into his thighs, trying to steady himself.  "I told him I was seeing someone and he asked who.  He didn't sound angry.  I told him about you, and then he got quiet for a minute.  And he said . . ." Gritting his teeth, he put as much effort as he could into finishing the sentence.  "He said to get away from him.  Get out of his sight before I messed up even more.  Said I shouldn't even be thinking about dating another nonmate.  I said I was sorry, so he grounded me and took away my phone." A weak shrug followed.  "I guess he could've taken it better, but you know, he's my dad."

Something hardened in Mai's expression.  "Zuko, that's horrible.  I can't believe he did that when you told him the truth.  You didn't mess up.  It's not your fault.  Besides, he didn't end up marrying his soulmate, right? Who's he to talk?"

He managed a nod.  "I wanted to say that, but he probably would've hit me.  It wouldn't be respectful.  He's my _dad_.  Besides, their relationship didn't . . . didn't work out too well."

Mai nodded back, subsiding into silence.  She seemed to understand.  "I'm sorry that happened." Her hand brushed against his cheek and Zuko finally turned to look at her fully.  Something about the feeling of her skin on his drained all the tension out of his body, leaving him exhausted.  "Can I kiss you?"

"I'd love that."

They spent what felt like an eternity there just enjoying each other's presence.  For Zuko, it was something new and uncertain, despite the fact that they'd been going out for almost a month.  Liking Mai (or people in general) was almost completely foreign to him, a weird vulnerability that he still wasn't used to.  It kind of unsettled him how much he actually cared about this girl, and how much he liked caring.  

"Mai! Come downstairs right now!" Michi pounded on the sliding door.  "You can't stay up there forever.  I've always said you have to start contributing to this family, you can't just sit around up here with your boyfriend!"

Just like that, the moment was shattered.  Sighing, Mai stood and helped pull Zuko to his feet.  "Thanks for coming.  I'm glad you did . . . what you did.  It was probably hard for you." She kissed his cheek.

"No big deal." But it was, and both of them knew it.  "Hey, are you free next Saturday?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Nothing, I just wanted to surprise you."

"As if you haven't given me plenty of surprises already." She smiled slightly.  "Come on, let's go, I don't think my mom will be patient with me for much longer."

As exhausted as he felt, he forced out a laugh.    "Yeah.  Okay."

"Okay."


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko gives Mai a surprise

"Are you sure this blindfold is necessary?"

"Absolutely! Do you need me to carry you? Is it too much?"

"Zuko, I'm fine," Mai said, swatting his hands away.  "It's just a little . . . weird." She nearly tripped over a tree root, but managed to steady herself just in time.  "This is really thick grass.  Are we going where I think we are?"

"Shh, you'll ruin the surprise," Zuko said in lieu of an answer.  He was kind of busy trying to make it to their destination without any casualties, as the hill was steeper than he remembered, and it was tough trying to navigate it with a blindfolded Mai in tow.  "Okay, a little to the left . . ."

They finally arrived on the crest of the hill, the big metal gates looming before them.  "Alright, just stay there," Zuko told her.

Mai stopped moving, folding her arms over her chest.  Even while blindfolded she managed to look exasperated.  "Zuko, I appreciate the gesture, but really--"

"No, no, wait, I got this." Zuko shoved at the gates, grunting a little with the effort.  At last they swung open with an ear-splitting clang.  "You can take off the blindfold now.  Surprise, I guess?"

Fingers fiddling with the ends for a moment, Mai finally got the cloth undone and let it drop to the ground.  "You took me to the cemetery?"

"Yeah.  My entire family is buried on the other side of that hill.  Well, the parts of my family that are dead, anyway.  I come here a few times every year with Uncle.  I thought you might like to see it.  And there's something else I want to show you, too." He took her hand, the other one drifting unconsciously to the back of his neck.  "I realize that this is kind of depressing, but I thought you might appreciate the graveyard vibe.  It goes with your whole _thing_."

Mai frowned, her spare hand going to her hip.  "I don't have a _thing_."

"You totally have a _thing_."

"Whatever.  Just show me the stuff." She kissed him, an irrefutable counterargument.

"Right this way."

He had to admit that leading her to their destination was a lot easier when she could see.  They made good time, even though Mai's boots kept getting stuck on tree roots and Zuko kept tripping over his own feet trying to help her.  Making their way down the hill, they hurried over to another, smaller hill.  A cluster of gravestones sat at the base.  The grass was neatly trimmed and each headstone was impressively tall.

"Actually, could you put the blindfold back on?" Zuko said sheepishly.  He reclaimed his hand and scampered up the slope.  "I've got another surprise for us both."

Mai folded her arms over her chest.  "No."

So much for that.  He sighed and reached behind the tree to remove the picnic basket.  "I made us lunch.  Actually, Uncle made us lunch, but I helped.  A little.  Well, I bought the tea bags before Uncle made us the tea.  I stirred it a little, too."

His girlfriend's stony expression slowly melted into something resembling a smile.  She let out a quiet, velvety laugh, and Zuko was astonished to see her blushing.  "A picnic.  I suppose I should be surprised.  That was very thoughtful of you.  Even if the setting is . . . wow.  So what's for lunch?"

Kneeling, Zuko started to unpack the basket, spreading a white blanket on the ground.  "It's jook.  My dad doesn't really like this sort of thing, but Uncle likes exploring other cultures, especially food, so he's always giving me stuff like this without my dad knowing.  And of course there's tea for us, too.  Come on."

Tentatively seating herself on the blanket, Mai sniffed the open thermos of soup.  "It's nice.  I've never had jook before.  Anything else?"

Zuko smiled.  "I got your favorite.  A big, fancy fruit tart with rose petals on top."

"Oh, Zuko!" Mai looked into the basket, one of her rare smiles spreading across her face.  "It looks great." She pulled off her shoes and tucked her knees neatly underneath her.  "Could we move over a bit? My parents will kill me if I get grass stains on this dress.  We have an image to maintain."

Zuko nodded and helped her pull the blanket to the side.  "Um . . . you wanna see the graves?" He took a sip of tea.

Mai shrugged.  "Sure, why not."

As Mai watched, Zuko gave a mumbling overview of the parts of his family that had been buried in the cemetery.  "And there's my granddad . . ." He pointed to a marble headstone a little taller than the rest.  "Azulon, he's who Azula's named after . . . she never shuts up about it, too . . . and there's my cousin, Lu Ten.  He's why I come here with Uncle so often.  We usually bring flowers and stuff for him, but I was worried I might give too many of those to you instead." He reddened at the accidental admission.  "Sorry, I shouldn't have said that."

"No.  No, it's fine.  I'm glad you brought me here.  I'm glad you trust me enough to show me this." She gently slipped her hand back into his.  "Can we eat now?"

"Yeah, definitely."

They ate in mostly quiet, their spoons occasionally clinking against the sides of their bowls.  The day was bright and the shade was cool.  Zuko refilled their teacups, hoping to god he'd gotten the right flavor.  He sipped his, staring across the blanket at Mai.  A bracelet of black marker flowers encircled both of her wrists, making her skin seem even paler and more fragile.  "Is the tea okay?" He asked, fingers fidgeting. 

"It's great.  Thank you for the food and everything.  Guess you can be romantic, hm?" She kissed his cheek lightly.  The quiet returned.

Eventually, he broke the silence.  "Hey," he said.  "I want to tell you something."

It took a moment for her to respond.  "What is it, Zuko?"

"You asked about this a while ago, and I didn't tell you about it because, you know, we weren't dating and we'd only known each other for a few weeks and stuff, so I didn't want--"

"Zuko," Mai interrupted, sounding faintly annoyed.  "Cut to the chase."

"Right.  Yeah." Zuko closed his eyes.  He wasn't used to baring his soul.  He had to resist the urge to call the whole thing off and get as far away from Mai as possible.  "It's how I got my scar."

Mai looked down.  Her grip on his hand tightened.  "Oh."

"I mean, if you don't want to hear it--"

"It's fine," she said, trying her best to smile at him.  "You can tell me anything.  You know that, right?"

"Yeah, of course.  Anyway, it was a while ago.  My uncle and I were sitting in on one of my dad's business meetings, since Uncle's an important part of the company or whatever, and he got my dad to let me in.  I wanted to see what it was like."

"I thought your uncle ran the tea shop?"

"He does, he does," Zuko said hurriedly.  "He doesn't really like what my dad's doing with the family business, but he's still got a lot of influence for some reason.  So.  I was there.  My dad wasn't too happy with me because I'd just told him about Sokka a few weeks before, and I was technically grounded.  He got really mad at me about that . . ."

Those words were all it took for him to be there again.  Fourteen-year-old him, biting his lip and looking down, even though he knew that would only make him look weak.  And weakness is a crime in his house, just another excuse for his father to shout at him as Azula looks on in satisfaction and he wishes more than anything that his mother was here.  Fourteen-year-old him, telling his father that he has something to tell him and Ozai telling him to go away.  Fourteen-year-old him trembling ever so slightly and, for the first time in years, putting his foot down.

He shuddered and pulled himself back into the present.  "Sorry.  Anyway.  I was at the meeting, and I wasn't supposed to be talking."

"Let me guess--you said something that got you in trouble." It was more of a statement than a guess.  She knew him too well.

"Yeah.  They were doing something I didn't agree with.  Something--" The word _wrong_ stuck in his throat.  "My dad didn't want to do anything in front of all his business associates, so he waited until later to . . . to . . ." He was shaking.  Why was he telling her this? Why should he tell anyone this? This was wrong, this was wrong, this was wrong.  His father's voice echoed in his head.  "He threw a candle at me."

"What?" There was more emotion in that single word than in almost anything he'd ever heard her say.  "Zuko, that's awful.  Just for speaking your mind? Your dad is terrible!"

"No he's not, he's my dad!" Zuko said.  One of her hands rested lightly on his shoulder, but he batted it away.  "Stop.  I don't know why I'm even telling you."

"Because I care about you." After a second, Mai retracted both of her hands, staring into her lap.  The silence stretched out, the picnic basket lying forgotten at their feet.

"It isn't fair," she said at last.  "It isn't fair that everyone hates us because of this." She looked up.  "I like girls, and guys.  I really like you."

"Same," Zuko said.  He didn't know what else to say.

"It isn't fair," Mai repeated.  "Everything sucks."

"You're beautiful when you hate the world," Zuko told her.  He rubbed his thumb gently against her wrist.

"I don't hate you."

"I don't hate you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ten points to the Hogwarts house of anyone who can spot the Smoke and Shadows reference. I know Zuko got his scar when he was thirteen, but this is fan fiction. Inaccuracies abound. I don't think too many people actually read this, but if you're out there, please give me kudos/comments, they are my fuel source guys (and gals, and nonbinary pals).


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko and Mai meet some old friends at the Jasmine Dragon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This takes place about a year after the last chapter. Mai and Zuko have helped each other get over a lot of their issues, and they've repaired some of their relationships with other people.

"Hey, guys, glad you could make it!"

Zuko waved to a familiar pair of people from where he sat with Mai, beckoning the couple in the doorway over to join them.  Sokka and Suki, laughing and shoving one another, slid into the Jasmine Dragon's leather booth across from Zuko and Mai.  Sokka had an arm slung around his girlfriend, who giggled and ruffled his hair.  "Good to see you, Zuko," Sokka said, reaching out a hand for a fist bump.  When it wasn't reciprocated, he kept his hand out for an uncomfortably long amount of time, then retracted it with a shrug.  

"Thanks for inviting us," Suki said with a smile.  She'd grown her hair out since the last time Zuko had seen her, and it was now long enough to brush against her chin, with the top layer gathered into a ponytail.  Her posture had straightened out and she somehow carried herself with more confidence than he'd ever seen her display before.  She wore a green turtleneck and a loose black skirt.  "Your uncle has a really nice place, huh?"

"Oh yeah, it's pretty cool," Mai said.  She slouched against the table, shoulders folding inward in her black sweater as if to protect herself, her gaze directed firmly at the table.  Zuko squeezed her hand to comfort her.  All she needed to do was make it through the next hour or so.  Maybe she'd even enjoy it.  "So, have you met Iroh before, Suki?"

"No, but Sokka has.  He's told me a lot, haven't you?"

Sokka laughed and bumped her shoulder.  "I love Iroh.  He's awesome, you'll love him too." He ruffled Suki's hair, which made her giggle, pushing him off playfully.  As she did so, Zuko saw a script  **Sok** peek out from the side of her neck.  He gripped Mai's hand tighter.

"Yeah, about my uncle . . ." Zuko took a breath and tried for a smile, which he still wasn't quite used to.  It was Mai's turn to squeeze his hand.  "I'm actually going to move in with him next year, when I turn 18.  He's helped me figure out a lot, and I think living with him would be better than . . . than living with my dad."

It had been Mai who had suggested the idea of living with Iroh, and they hadn't really told anyone else yet, especially Azula or Ozai.  "Think of this as a test run," Mai had said, with one of her rare smiles.  "And . . . I can come with you, if you want.  My mom's been saying that I should get out more.  And talk to people.  And stop acting depressed all the time."  Now they were here, Sokka and Suki were here, and Zuko waited with bated breath for their reaction.

"Zuko, that's great!" Sokka's face split into a wide grin and he leaned over to knock his fist against Zuko's shoulder.  "You could use that.  No offense, but your dad kind of sucks."

"No, he's--" Zuko bit back the near-involuntary response.  "Yeah.  Pretty much the worst father in the history of fathers."  He forced a grin as Sokka and Suki laughed.  Even Mai cracked a smile.  "I've been thinking about college, too.  Well, I'm thinking about taking a gap year before college.  Try to figure myself out a little.  Work on martial arts, and tea." He felt himself relax as he said it, noticing the others' startled expressions shifting to something almost like gladness.

As if he'd been summoned by the word "tea", Iroh hurried out of the kitchen to greet them.  "Hello! It's so nice to see all of you again.  Welcome to the shop.  What can I get you? Zuko, want to enjoy a cup of calming jasmine tea?"

Zuko laughed.  They placed their orders (with a small delay due to bickering among Sokka and Suki that rapidly devolved into a poking contest), and Iroh disappeared again, promising to return shortly.  He left an awkward silence in his wake as the argument finally died down.

"Um . . ." Zuko latched onto the first topic that came to his mind.  "How's, uh, how's Katara doing?" He could never forget Sokka's younger sister's name; after all, it was tattooed onto the back of his neck.  

Sokka smirked at him.  "Aw, she's fine.  She's Katara: annoying, but fine.  Actually, she's been getting into tai chi, and she's pretty good at it.  Just don't tell her I said that." He laughed, nearly spilling tea all over himself.  "There's this kid in her class who's supposedly some sorta whiz kid prodigy at all that martial arts shit, but they're friends and she can even kick his ass now."

A smile crept onto Mai's face as she made a show of inspecting her nails.  "Your sister sounds interesting.  Maybe you can introduce me to her sometime."

"Can do!" Sokka turned the smirk on Mai, then elbowed Zuko.  "Zuko, your girlfriend's cool," he said in a mock-whispered.  "How do I get her to talk more?"

Zuko and Mai both stiffened.  Mai's smile disappeared, fingers tightening around her teacup.  "Sorry I'm not exciting enough for you," she muttered.  Her eyes remained fixed on the surface of the table.  "I was under the impression that this would be 'fun'."

"Hey, what'd I say?" Sokka looked confused.

Suki smacked him on the arm.  "Sorry about him, and if we've been insensitive.  We just . . . haven't seen you two in a while.  We want to catch up.  That is why you invited us here, right?" She looked over at Zuko hopefully, then turned to Mai in a transparent attempt to change the subject.  "So, Mai, are you still doing karate?"

For a few seconds, Mai couldn't seem to remember how to talk.  Her hand felt even icier than usual in his.  "No," she said eventually.  "My mom says there isn't much point in it anymore.  I can't be getting into trouble, since we have my father's political career to think about."

" . . . Oh." Suki glanced away and started fiddling with her hair.  "I am.  My trainer says he has an opening for a job as his assistant, so I'll be in town all summer teaching martial arts.  I'd love to have you there sometime."  

"My dad's coming home this summer," Sokka chimed in.  "I've been wanting to introduce him to Suki.  Y'know, so he can meet my soulmate."

Zuko's eyes flickered down to the table.  "Yeah," he managed.

"He's in the military," Sokka continued, oblivious.  "My dad, I mean.  Which I guess you already knew.  Well, Mai probably didn't, but you did, Zuko.  Probably.  I mean, you might've forgotten by now, but . . . well . . . uh . . . I'll shut up now." 

"That's . . . good," Zuko said, then blinked.  "Wait! I meant your dad coming back, not you shutting up! I mean, not that your talking was amazing, but . . . I'm sorry, I don't know how to . . . talk to people?" He fought the urge to slam his head on the table as his face heated up.

The good thing about this particular faux pas was that it successfully shattered the tension.  Sokka and Suki both burst out laughing, Mai leaned into him and let out one of those adorable velvety chuckles of hers, and the temperature of Zuko's face eventually cooled off.  "That . . . that's rough, buddy," Sokka managed, swiping tears out of his eyes, which set them all off again.  

They spent the next few minutes talking about nothing important, laughing, and drinking tea.  Mai looked slightly more animated by the end of it, and her grip on his hand relaxed.  Silently, Zuko thanked her for that.  She just had to make it through the rest of the outing and they were home free.

"Well, it was nice to see you both," Suki said, smiling as she stood and brushed herself off.  "I hope we can do this again sometime."

"Of course," Zuko said.  He really did, now.

"Of course," Mai echoed.  As soon as the door swung shut behind the happy couple, she slumped against Zuko as if all the air had been let out of her and exhaled softly.  "I need a drink."

"Mai!" Zuko exclaimed, shocked, and immediately wished he could take it back.  Neither of them had consumed alcohol in over a month, despite Azula's prompting, but he could understand why his girlfriend might want some now.  Seeing Sokka and Suki again had been complicated, to say the least.  Sometimes some good old-fashioned inebriation was a good thing.  "Sorry.  Hey, I'm proud of you." He gave her hand another squeeze.

She looked up at him, eyes half shut.  "What for?"

"For making it through all that.  I know it's hard for you."

"Thank you." The words were barely audible, yet they sent a thrill down his spine.  "I know I shouldn't be this way, it's just--they're so damn happy.  I hate that I can't be like that."

Zuko closed his eyes.  How many times had those words come out of his mouth:  _"I shouldn't be this way"_ ,  _"I hate that I can't be like that"_? Hearing them from Mai . . . well, it wasn't right.  She didn't deserve to feel that way. 

It had taken him years to realize that maybe he didn't deserve to feel that way, either.

On impulse, he pressed a quick kiss to the top of her head.  "You don't need to be like that.  You're you, and Mai, you're . . . amazing."

"Guess I'm buying into the 'happy soulmate' bullshit, huh?" Mai muttered.  

"Maybe.  But I think we're doing okay."


End file.
